Little boy dreaming of becoming a pilot in retro style uniformThe Abiding Fathers blog is a collection of works from our founder, Bill Dotson, along with stories from guest bloggers, providing help for all types of fathers.

CHANGE…is a constant. Sounds like an oxymoron! Very few things stay constant, at least not earthly ones. Politicians run campaigns on the idea of ‘change’. Technology and new inventions offer us ways to do some things differently, more efficiently, less expensive; well, many times. All are designed to change the way we do things or think about issues. Some of us are quick to dive in and try the idea or product, while others take a ‘wait and see’ attitude—and then there are those who just want buy in. One such group comes to mind on the TV ad, The Settlers! Change is, for the most part, good, but not always.

Most young generations have the desire to ‘change the world’ in some way. They are driven by their dreams to make a difference. But most of these never come about. Reality sets in; we lose the unbridled imagination and settle on just ‘making it’. Maybe you are one of those who tried and failed, who gave up. It was too big, too expensive, too hard!

You simply got kicked in the teeth too many times

As a dad, you have big plans for your family. But the harder you try to influence change in their behavior, actions, even thoughts; it just isn’t working. So, like many, you just give up, quit trying. Some even wash their hands of the whole disgusting mess…your wife, kids, family! Seems like the harder you try to ‘change’ or ‘fix’ them, the worse it gets. I resonate with you. Been there, done that!

But maybe we have not focused on the one thing we could change, US! It’s possible that before we can change the world, even our marriage and family, we need to focus on changing our own lives. Why not start there? I know, most of us guys think we’re ok, not really the problem. I would suggest that is the first lie we have to stop believing. It might just be a bigger problem than you think. Like beginning with ‘taking the log out of your own eye, so you can see the speck in others eyes’. It’s possible we dads need to do some heavy lumber-jack work!

The first place to start is:

  • Humbling yourself and admitting you may be the problem
  • Praying about what needs to be changed
  • Asking God to reveal those issues that need addressing
  • Look deeply into your heart and His word for solution
  • Relying on the Holy Spirit to bring about real lasting change in you

Theodore Roosevelt was right. “If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.”

Dads, it is ‘better caught than taught’. And since not much is working, why not give it a shot. Become the ‘role model’ that you can become, and watch the ‘change’ start coming over your family as they start observing and following the new and improved you. Can’t change the world? Change what you can, yourself. It is never too late, never! You can’t do it alone. But “you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you.” (Phil. 4.13). He has known you need to change; He’s just been waiting for you to want it.

Now, you just might be astonished at how you are starting to change the world around you, something you dreamed about as a child!

Life Today
Bill C. Dotson
www.abidingfathers.org
bill@abidingfathers.org